Wikipedia fan fiction, Oh Jimbo, she gasped as I thrust my turgid prose... Options

[carbuncle]

I guess it was inevitable. Please enjoy this really, really lame piece of soft-core porn Wikipedia fan fiction:

"M-Mr. Wales? You wanted to see me?"

Her words jolted me from my trance and I immediately returned to presence.

"Oh, ah... I did want to see you," I nervously stumbled over my words. "I mean ah, well, yes. I wanted to see you - I mean speak to you." She smiled at my nervous attempt to speak, but I knew she was just as nervous as I was. "I mean... I mean call me Jimbo. Jimbo Wales. You don't need to call me Mr. Wales."

She smiled serenely again, a lock of her blue hair falling over her eye. She gently brushed it back into place.

Clearly the author hasn't seen those text messages allegedly sent by Jimbo to the completely sane and not crazy at all Rachel Marsden.

[TungstenCarbide]

I guess it was inevitable. Please enjoy this really, really lame piece of soft-core porn Wikipedia fan fiction:

needs some pictures

[Peter Damian]

I guess it was inevitable. Please enjoy this really, really lame piece of soft-core porn Wikipedia fan fiction:

needs some pictures

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Kasuga is responsible for these images.

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Works_by_Kasuga

It was he who drew this notorious image

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lolicon_Sample.png

as being his own work. His deviant art site is here

http://kasuga39.deviantart.com/

where one of his pictures got banned for underage nudity. He does not yet have any products for sale

http://kasuga39.deviantart.com/prints/?utm...paign=printstab

He says here that he draws pornographic comic strips

http://kasuga39.deviantart.com/journal/12617458/#comments

And his website is here

http://www.geocities.jp/kasuga399/

where you can find many images of underage girls drawn in a sexualized way.

[edit] And one of the sites he links to on this page http://www.geocities.jp/kasuga399/bookmark.html#policy is very disturbing.

http://satsuki-yamai.net/top DOT html (do not link from work)
http://satsuki-yamai.net/status_doku/index DOT html (probably illegal)

Cartoons of little girls being tortured. Why is he linking to this? Why is the artist behind the famous Wikipedia 'Wikipe-tan' linking to websites showing little girls with their genitalia being mutilated, screaming in pain? Beyond belief.

See also here http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Commons:...icon_Sample.png for the usual idiotic discussion about whether the lolicon image was illegal or not.

It's a ridiculous assertion. First, Kasuga wouldn't have drawn it if it was pornographic. Second, there's no nudity, and no sexual situation portrayed. We have pictures of real naked children on Commons, and have for a long time; this doesn't even come close. Powers (talk) 22:58, 8 April 2009 (UTC)

[edit]

Another site he links to portrays graphic sexual abuse of minors

http://avonlea.sakura.ne.jp/dojin DOT htm (almost certainly illegal)



This post has been edited by Peter Damian:

[Peter Damian]

----- Original Message -----
From: The Damians
To: Jimmy Wales
Cc: Sue Gardner ; Newyorkbrad (Wikipedia) ; Cool Hand Luke ; Alison Cassidy ; Anthony DiPierro ; Gregory Kohs ; Judd Bagley ; John Vandenberg ; Durova ; Delicious Carbuncle ; tarantino ; Somey
Sent: Saturday, January 02, 2010 11:34 AM
Subject: User:Kasuga


Dear Jimmy,

You are almost certainly familiar with the work of the Wikipedia user:Kasuga http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Works_by_Kasuga who is the author of the famous manga character 'Wikipi-tan', the lolicon who personnifies Wikipedia itself. I am sure you are, because there is a picture of you with Wikipi-tan here http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Jim..._Wikipe-tan.jpg .

What do you know about the 'artist' Kasuga, who is also an administrator on the Japanese Wikipedia? I am very disturbed about this person. He is the author of this picture, http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lolicon_Sample.png still on Commons, which depicts little girls in sexual poses. He is the owner of this website http://www.geocities.jp/kasuga399/ where you can find many more images of pre-pubescent girls in sexual poses. More disturbingly, he links to a number of pornographic websites on his page here http://www.geocities.jp/kasuga399/bookmark.html#policy some of which are obviously and uncontroversially illegal, since one shows pictures of little girls with their genitals being mutilated, the other shows pictures of them being sexually abused.

Wishing you a happy and child-friendly New Year,

Peter

[The Wales Hunter]

Jimmy deleted the slash fiction!

12:54, 2 January 2010 Jimbo Wales (talk | contribs) deleted "User:7107delicious/Wikipedia stories" ‎ (G10: Attack page or negative unsourced BLP)

Thank you for pointing this page out, Skomorokh. I have deleted it. I would block the user, but since the page was a pornographic story written about me, some might consider me to have a conflict of interest, so I'll let someone else deal with that aspect of things.--Jimbo Wales (talk) 11:57, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Please tell me someone took a copy first?

This post has been edited by The Wales Hunter:

[Peter Damian]

Jimmy deleted the slash fiction!

12:54, 2 January 2010 Jimbo Wales (talk | contribs) deleted "User:7107delicious/Wikipedia stories" ‎ (G10: Attack page or negative unsourced BLP)

Thank you for pointing this page out, Skomorokh. I have deleted it. I would block the user, but since the page was a pornographic story written about me, some might consider me to have a conflict of interest, so I'll let someone else deal with that aspect of things.--Jimbo Wales (talk) 11:57, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Please tell me someone took a copy first?

My thoughts exactly. I didn't. But try here

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnBooks...y_of_Wikipe-tan

I have made a copy of this.

This post has been edited by Peter Damian:

[The Wales Hunter]

Is it not related to this?

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnBooks...y_of_Wikipe-tan

[The Wales Hunter]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Adm...r:7107delicious

I'm uneasy about this. An indefinite block for what appears to have been a rather dumb prank? Would a stern warning and maybe a block of a few days not have sufficed? -- ChrisO (talk) 13:47, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Writing slash fiction about Jimbo sleeping with underage girls is hardly a minor offence! GTD 13:56, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

This post has been edited by The Wales Hunter:

[GlassBeadGame]

Jimmy deleted the slash fiction!

12:54, 2 January 2010 Jimbo Wales (talk | contribs) deleted "User:7107delicious/Wikipedia stories" ‎ (G10: Attack page or negative unsourced BLP)

Thank you for pointing this page out, Skomorokh. I have deleted it. I would block the user, but since the page was a pornographic story written about me, some might consider me to have a conflict of interest, so I'll let someone else deal with that aspect of things.--Jimbo Wales (talk) 11:57, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Please tell me someone took a copy first?

My thoughts exactly. I didn't. But try here

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnBooks...y_of_Wikipe-tan

I have made a copy of this.

This is somewhat complex. Mr. Wales has a personal background in soft-core porn and a public reputation for flings and woman chasing. He is one of the founders of project (Wikipedia) that has persistent and ongoing issues on a number of fronts relating to child protection, including hosting images depicting children in highly sexualized manner. Because Wikipedia is very much a creature of internet culture and a vehicle for hosting "fanboy" content it has a large amount of content relating to manga prevalent in internet culture which sexualizes and exploits children.

Given this background I would not dismiss a parody or satire of Mr. Wales having a magna girlfriend as completely inappropriate. It may well have a place in constellation of dissent opposing Wikipedia. The Unencyclopedia piece has selected relatively modest images and for the most part the content of the text is not sexualized beyond what is needed make the piece seem minimally plausible, although one or two sentence maybe go to far. I think perhaps Mr. Wales was more concerned about criticism to himself than any child protection concern.

BTW I was a bit taken aback by this Urban Dictionary entry for "Wikitan." So Wikipedia has a "mascot" of a sexualized child image whose very name refers to someone a person wants to have sex with?

[The Wales Hunter]

There's a difference between chasing a bit of skirt and it being suggested you are sexually attracted to children.

[thekohser]

Jimmy deleted the slash fiction!

12:54, 2 January 2010 Jimbo Wales (talk | contribs) deleted "User:7107delicious/Wikipedia stories" ‎ (G10: Attack page or negative unsourced BLP)

Thank you for pointing this page out, Skomorokh. I have deleted it. I would block the user, but since the page was a pornographic story written about me, some might consider me to have a conflict of interest, so I'll let someone else deal with that aspect of things.--Jimbo Wales (talk) 11:57, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Please tell me someone took a copy first?

I suppose that all has to do with the e-mail I sent Jimbo about the page in the wee hours of last night. I congratulated him on the WMF meeting its financial goal, and I expressed delight in how the server space was being thusly utilized:

==The Story of Wikipe-tan==
I just can't stand it. When I see her I can only grit my teeth and clench my fists as hard as I can from jumping out and screaming "I love you!" at the top of my lungs. I literally have to bite down on my tongue, sometimes until it bleeds or else I'll lose control and caress her with kisses until the end of the world. She's just so beautiful. Not in that super model barbie doll way. She's legitimately beautiful. The super models put on make up and dress up and get air brushed so they can look like her. She doesn't need that shit, she's wonderful on her own.

"Mr. Wales, you have a visitor." It's my secretary. I tell her to let her in, I already know who it is. I asked her to come to my office so we could talk. Not about work or anything, just... talk. I know it's against office policy but I just want to see her again. That gorgeous, naive smile, those huge, innocent eyes that seemed to take in the world so carefully. Her body was small, delicate, as if the slightest breeze would shatter her like a glass rose. I couldn't stop thinking about her. Always. She was always on my mind.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in, Wikipe-tan."

I could see the very edges of her lips move, forming a subtle smile as she gracefully took a seat opposite me. She sat there, so serenely, her hands holded on her lap like the necks of two swans asleep in a lover's embrace. I could see her feet moving nervously and her back was stiff with tension. Still, she was more beautiful than I had remembered. I stared at her a moment, drinking in her hour glass curves and supple, almost nubile body.

"M-Mr. Wales? You wanted to see me?"

Her words jolted me from my trance and I immediately returned to presence.

"Oh, ah... I did want to see you," I nervously stumbled over my words. "I mean ah, well, yes. I wanted to see you - I mean speak to you." She smiled at my nervous attempt to speak, but I knew she was just as nervous as I was. "I mean... I mean call me Jimbo. Jimbo Wales. You don't need to call me Mr. Wales."

She smiled serenely again, a lock of her blue hair falling over her eye. She gently brushed it back into place.

"I asked you to my office, Wikipe-tan, because I wanted you to know that I lov-" I clenched my fist and took a deep breath, steadying myself. "I mean, I wanted to know if... if you'd like to go to dinner with me." I did it. I actually asked her. I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner with me. I couldn't believe I'd actually done it. There was silence for a moment; it was almost like I could see her thoughts through her clear eyes. I held my breath waiting for an answer.

Then her sweet, melodic voice broke the silence. "I'd like that." My heart raced, I couldn't find the words to say. I wanted to jump up and down and shout for hours about how Wikipe-tan and I were going on a date, and I probably would have if I hadn't clenched my fist so tightly that the whites of my knuckles were visible. The brief pain brought me back.

"I, uh," I stammered, "I'm glad. I'll have uh, I'll have my secretary make the arrangements, okay?"

"Okay."

She lithely got up from her chair and made for the door, her slender body swaying slightly as she moved. I couldn't help but shout "YES!" in jubilation as she left the room. In just a few hours, we'd be on our first date.

* *

"You... you look amazing," was all I was able to stammer as I gaped in awe at her. The intricate, silk kimono she wore was tight on her body, displaying her nubile curves. She grinned slightly.

"Thank you, Mr. Wales," she responded.

"We went over this, Wikipe-tan. Call me Jimbo."

"O-okay, Jimbo."

I couldn't take my eyes off of her, she was so beautiful, so radiant. Her crimson red lipstick shimmered on her lips and signaled to me almost like a lighthouse signaling a ship. I wanted to reach over the table, kiss her, and it took all my willpower to stop myself from doing it. I couldn't believe it, I was actually at dinner with Wikipe-tan. I felt like I was going crazy, I wanted to touch her, to feel her willowy body in my arms and hold her forever, to let her know she'd be safe in my arms and that I would never let go. I'd gently caress her with the tips of my fingers, running them from her head to her back, up and down, tickling her delicate frame.

I shook myself. What the hell was I thinking? I needed a drink to calm myself down. I reached over to get a drink from my wineglass, but my hand bumped into something. It was Wikipe-tan's hand. She was holding the glass.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" I quickly apologized.

She grinned softly again and I realized I hadn't taken my hand off of hers yet. I quickly let go and put my hand in my lap, but she began to giggle. "There's no need to be sorry." I laughed too. We both let out belly laughs and I could feel the tension between us drifting away. The mood was lightening.

"I want to know about you, Wikipe-tan. I want you to tell me about yourself, what makes you tick, what you like and dislike." I told her.

"I don't know what there is to tell," she said softly. "I'm just an ordinary girl from the city. There's nothing special about me."

"I don't think so," I said. "I... I think you're very special, Wikipe-tan. I think that you're a lot different from the other girls and I..." I paused for a moment, trying to think of what to say, "I like that."

"Thank you, Mr... Jimbo. I," she looked down and blushed, "I think you're special too."

I placed my hand back on the table and slowly inched it towards hers. Her skin was soft, downy to the touch and her hands were small and delicate. She smiled as I placed my hands around hers; I could feel a real connection.

"I think you're very beautiful, Wikipe-tan. I've..." I sighed, my eyes glancing away in embarrassment. "I've thought that for a long time."

"Thank you..." She blushed again and brushed a stray lock of her blue hair. "I'm... I'm not so good with compliments."

"You don't get them often?" I asked.

"No..." She said. "You're my first." She smiled at me, but her eyes widened when she considered the double meaning of her words. "No, no, I mean that you're the first person to have ever called me beautiful!" She quickly exclaimed.

I grinned a little and looked back at her. "You're my first too."

"What do you mean?" She asked quizzically.

"The first girl I've ever called beautiful."

* *

"This is where I live," she told me, her hand still clasped in my own. "It's nothing special, just a small apartment. Would you like to come in?"

I couldn't believe it. Wikipe-tan wanted me to come into her home. I squeezed her hand a little in exhilaration and nodded, "I-I'd love to." She and I walked inside the old building, hands locked together, and walked up the stairs to her apartment. She unlocked the door and we stepped inside. The first thing I immediately noticed was the number of beautifully-drawn anime wall scrolls hanging on her walls.

"I'm an aspiring manga-ka," she said bashfully. I stepped over to look at one of her pictures, a warrior with a katana clad in red robes cleaving through a swath of foes. In the corner I recognized the Japanese character for 'Inuyasha'.

"Is this Inuyasha?" I asked her.

She nodded timidly, "Yes," she squeaked.

"This is... amazing," I gasped. "Why didn't you tell anyone about your drawings?"

She gazed at her feet in embarrassment, "I didn't think anyone would care..." I stepped over to her and ran my fingers through her hair, pressing her against my chest. I don't know if she was expecting it or not, but she didn't fight back. She held me too and looked into my eyes. I'm not entirely sure how long I was locked into her eyes, but it felt like an eternity of bliss.

"They're not blue." I said.

"Wh-what?"

"Your eyes, they're not blue." I paused for a moment and looked at them again. "They're... They're sapphire."

She smiled, and for a moment I thought she was going to say something, but then I felt her press in closer to me. She pressed her soft, angelic lips against mine and I felt a surge go through my body. I held her close, her fragile body in locked against mine as I explored her velvet lips with my own.

"There's... something I want to show you," Wikipe-tan spoke softly. She grabbed my hand without waiting for an answer and lead me through her apartment until we finally arrived in her bedroom. She laid me down on the bed and I pressed myself against her. I could feel my engorged member rising as the heat of the moment escalated. She kissed me again and spoke softly into my ear. "I... I want you to be my first."

"I want you to be mine too."

* *

I held her closely in my arms, underneath the protective covers of her bed sheet. I couldn't tell if she was still awake or not. My fingers ran up and down her back and I listened to her gentle rhythmic breathing, watching as her nubile chest moved up and down with each breath. I smelled her soft, blue hair and kissed her forehead.

"I... I love you, Wikipe-tan." My whisper was barely audible underneath the chirping of the crickets in the midnight air. She squirmed a little in my arms, rustling the covers, and then looked back up at me. She kissed my chin gently and put her hand on my naked chest.

"I love you too..." she whispered. I smiled a little.

"I've... I've wanted to tell you that for such a long time." I told her.

"Me too." Her eyes slowly closed and her breathing slowed down. I held her against my chest and kissed her one last time before she fell asleep.

[The Wales Hunter]

She kissed me again and spoke softly into my ear. "I... I want you to be my first."

"I want you to be mine too."

Hang on...are WikiWeirdos trying to claim Jimbo is a virgin? (IMG:smilys0b23ax56/default/laugh.gif)

[thekohser]

Is it not related to this?

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnBooks...y_of_Wikipe-tan

I've just sent Jimbo another e-mail regarding "the rest of the library". That page will likely soon be down, too.

We have to remember, this is the guy who, when faced with a threatened boycott of his advertisers on a "Spanking Art" wiki that glorified child abuse, got his feathers ruffled because the "proper channels" for complaining about the site weren't exercised.

Anyway, at the bottom of Uncyclopedia, I see this ad for Lostpedia.

We really do have to wonder if maybe Jimbo doesn't "deserve" at least some of this sexualized garbage following him around.

[The Wales Hunter]

I've just sent Jimbo another e-mail regarding "the rest of the library". That page will likely soon be down, too.

I doubt it. I told him about it on his talk page but he said he doesn't get involved in policy on Unencyclopedia and that site seems an appropriate place for satire/humour.

He really doesn't get it.

Edit:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Adm...r:7107delicious

Could get interesting. Certainly different viewpoints of Jimbo/Loli-slash.

This post has been edited by The Wales Hunter:

[Doc glasgow]

Is it not related to this?

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnBooks...y_of_Wikipe-tan

I've just sent Jimbo another e-mail regarding "the rest of the library". That page will likely soon be down, too.

We have to remember, this is the guy who, when faced with a threatened boycott of his advertisers on a "Spanking Art" wiki that glorified child abuse, got his feathers ruffled because the "proper channels" for complaining about the site weren't exercised.

Anyway, at the bottom of Uncyclopedia, I see this ad for Lostpedia.

We really do have to wonder if maybe Jimbo doesn't "deserve" at least some of this sexualized garbage following him around.

There is a very serious question of the total failure of Wikimedia and Wikia to take moral responsibility for their content and have realistic child protection policies, and zero tolerance towards contributors who seek to push the bounds.

That's a good thing for this site to highlight.

However, let's not confuse that with Jimbo's allegedly slightly sleezy sexual reputation, which should be of no interest to us whatsoever. This thread has the possibility to bring out both the best and most useful critique that WR can provide, and the worst type of salacious nonsense.

[trenton]

I would block the user, but since the page was a pornographic story written about me, some might consider me to have a conflict of interest, so I'll let someone else deal with that aspect of things.

No, he promised not to block anybody after getting embroiled in controversy. Nice to see him twist that into being so virtuous as to not block someone he has a conflict of interest in, though. The guy is a shameless self promoter.

[thekohser]

However, let's not confuse that with Jimbo's allegedly slightly sleezy sexual reputation, which should be of no interest to us whatsoever.

It is relevant, Doc. And I have access to further information about Jimbo's sexual reputation that is not only not "slightly" sleazy -- it would make your head spin. Since it is first-hand hearsay, I'm comfortable reporting that it does exist, but I'm uncomfortable repeating it word-for-word. That would be the choice of the person who holds that information first-hand.

You see, as per usual with Jimbo, it's about hypocrisy and maintaining appearances otherwise.

[CharlotteWebb]

BTW I was a bit taken aback by this Urban Dictionary entry for "Wikitan." So Wikipedia has a "mascot" of a sexualized child image whose very name refers to someone a person wants to have sex with?

Unless it's attested elsewhere it's just another thing somebody made up.

See OS-tan for the actual etymology.

[Kelly Martin]

Please tell me someone took a copy first?

Of course. http://www.webcitation.org/5mTjWt7k0

[Doc glasgow]

However, let's not confuse that with Jimbo's allegedly slightly sleezy sexual reputation, which should be of no interest to us whatsoever.

It is relevant, Doc. And I have access to further information about Jimbo's sexual reputation that is not only not "slightly" sleazy -- it would make your head spin. Since it is first-hand hearsay, I'm comfortable reporting that it does exist, but I'm uncomfortable repeating it word-for-word. That would be the choice of the person who holds that information first-hand.

You see, as per usual with Jimbo, it's about hypocrisy and maintaining appearances otherwise.

This post is contemptible.

"It is relevant"

Sorry, the burden is on you to show that. I can't see how the hell it is. Jimbo is no icon of mine, but he's not setting himself up as a moral crusader, or perpetuating any "appearances otherwise." Muck chucking, just shows your own hypocrisy, nothing more.

I neither care about, nor am I titivated by, Jimbo's sexlife.

And I have access to further information about Jimbo's sexual reputation that is not only not "slightly" sleazy -- it would make your head spin. Since it is first-hand hearsay, I'm comfortable reporting that it does exist,

That's even further beneath contempt.

Now, you'll smear someone on the basis of information you wont disclose? So, we either "trust you" and your hearsay source, or we sink to your level and demand the details from you?

Frankly, this is the post of an amoral hypocritical guttersnipe.