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_ Bureaucracy _ The 2010 Wikipedia Review "WP:DICK of Distinction"

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

DO NOT VOTE until you read the following blurbs.

Image


Welcome, members of the Academy!


For those newcomers who have registered during the past year, we invite you to read http://wikipediareview.com/blog/20081117/the-wikipedia-review-awards-pageants/ of the pageant and its hallowed traditions.

The categories in which Wikipedia admins and peons will compete are the following:

http://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Don't_be_a_dick of Distinction, for the most appallingly corrupt performance as an Admin

The http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Tag_team event

Miss Incongeniality, for the most colorful and persistent violations of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:CIVIL

The Straight Shooter award, for honest admins

Cojones de latón, for non-admins who have displayed wit and valor in combat with the Cabal

The winner of the grand sweepstakes WP:DICK of Distinction honors will take home this magnificent memento, which we like to call "The Jimbo®":


Image


Now, please bear with us as we explain the unnecessarily complex voting procedures:

For the WP:DICK contestants, each member of the academy may cast votes for both DICK and Runner-Up (a condition which is said to respond well to traditional antibiotics.) The DICK vote counts as 2 points, while the Runner-Up counts as one. Thus, each voter has 3 points total to distribute among the contestants. Academy members may award all three points to one contestant by voting for him or her in both categories, or split the points between two contestants. Points will be tallied from the two categories, and the contestant with the most points wins, with the 2nd Place going to the contestant with the next highest point total. Got it? The same formula used to apply to the Straight Shooter and Cojones de latón categories, but this year the Program and Catering Committee was demanding overtime pay, so we scrapped that and all categories other than DICK will be simply one vote per category.

Ready... set... VOTE!

Electioneering within 100 feet of the polling place is encouraged, so feel free to post a paean to your candidate of choice, extolling his or her exquisite qualifications and achievements

Posted by: LessHorrid vanU

Are the pollsters aware that it appears you can vote for the same person in the Dick and Lesser Spotted Dick sections? I think that is wonderful!

Posted by: Milton Roe

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sun 10th January 2010, 2:16pm) *

The winner of the grand sweepstakes WP:DICK of Distinction honors will take home this magnificent memento, which we like to call "The Jimbo®":
Image


The winners also are encouraged to accept their awards while walking the red carpet to the strip-tease beat of [Hey,] Big Spender, preferably as covered by somebody singing like Shirley Bassey. And WR lyrics which are inevitable:

Hey, Big Wanker

The moment you post on the board,
We can see you are a Dick of Distinctionâ„¢
(A real big wanker)
A tag-team hits “undo”.
O, if you could only know
What happ’nin’ on The Review!

So wait while we get your Award,
We don’t hand this out to all admins we see!
Hey, Reverter!
Tag this edit diff "RV... V..V..V…"

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

QUOTE(LessHorrid vanU @ Sun 10th January 2010, 1:54pm) *

Are the pollsters aware that it appears you can vote for the same person in the Dick and Lesser Spotted Dick sections?
Yes, see blurbs above.

I would like to announce my decision to vote for Alison for Straight Shooter. I haven't seen many acts of real courage by any admin, and when it comes to our candidates that serve on the ArbCom, I have watched them sit impotently in the foxholes time after time as opportunities to do something really useful came and went. But I give Alison credit for one thing: she was the one who cancelled Chip Berlet's blank check. She may not even remember the occasion, but Chip's fragile ego couldn't take it, and not long thereafter he bailed, to the everlasting benefit of the project.

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

In the first day of voting, David Gerard has taken a commanding lead in the coveted DICK position (which may be for the best, because Somey has been on the case of the Program and Catering Committee about cost overruns for the pageant, and this way we may be able to re-use last year's cyber-engraved Jimbo® trophy.) In fact, based on early returns, it looks pretty much like a re-run of last year's voting: Gerard also leads the Miss Incongeniality event (although Cirt and Chillum are giving him a run for his money,) Cla68 has a firm grip on the Cojones, and in the Straight Shooter competition Thatcher has a narrow advantage over 2008 victor Alison. Due to the ever-shifting alliances of convenience at Wikipedia, the Tag-Team Event often holds the most surprises, but this year, the comeback team of SlimVirgin and Will Beback looks like the favorite.

All that being said, there are still many members of the Academy who have not yet dipped their avatars in the purple, so dark horses may emerge in any of these competitions. Stay tuned. popcorn.gif

Posted by: Peter Damian

When does voting end please.

Posted by: Milton Roe

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Mon 11th January 2010, 8:03am) *

In fact, based on early returns, it looks pretty much like a re-run of last year's voting: Gerard also leads the Miss Incongeniality event (although Cirt and Chillum are giving him a run for his money,) Cla68 has a firm grip on the Cojones, and in the Straight Shooter competition Thatcher has a narrow advantage over 2008 victor Alison.


Don't lose that firm grip on the Cojones, Cla68. wink.gif

Posted by: Trick cyclist

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sun 10th January 2010, 11:48pm) *

I would like to announce my decision to vote for Alison for Straight Shooter.

Hey, arent you the returning officer? Shouldnt you make an effort to try to appear to be impartial?

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Mon 11th January 2010, 3:03pm) *

dark horses may emerge in any of these competitions.

As long as theyre not female or they'll distract our Horse.

Posted by: A Horse With No Name

QUOTE(Trick cyclist @ Mon 11th January 2010, 3:58pm) *

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sun 10th January 2010, 11:48pm) *

dark horses may emerge in any of these competitions.

As long as theyre not female or they'll distract our Horse.


I've already voted for Alison! boing.gif

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

After two days of voting, Gerard is once again the front-running DICK. The fierce competition is for runner-up, where FT2 at 15 points is hotly pursued by Wild Bill Connolley at 14. Not much competition for Slim 'n' Will at the Tag-Team event however, but an exciting race for Miss Incongeniality where Chillum and his myriad other monikers is now neck-and-neck with Gerard. Alison has pulled ahead of Thatcher in the hotly contested Straight Shooter category, but clearly, Cla68 has Cojones in the bag.

Posted by: thekohser

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Tue 12th January 2010, 10:09am) *

... but clearly, Cla68 has Cojones in the bag.


Only because I'm stuck alphabetically at the bottom of the list, and Charles gets his big, fat "C" name up there near the top.

It's RIGGED!

Posted by: CharlotteWebb

QUOTE(thekohser @ Tue 12th January 2010, 4:30pm) *

Only because I'm stuck alphabetically at the bottom of the list, and Charles gets his big, fat "C" name up there near the top.

It's RIGGED!

I gotta say the definite article seems a bit presumptuous—you know, calling yourself the kohser as if there could not be more than one. You could change it to a kohser and achieve a position slightly above that of a nobody. tongue.gif





And yeah I know, you'd have to add a space or make sure Hersch uses some kind of "smart" lexi-sorting.

Posted by: thekohser

According to http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2303648901 on Facebook, only Jim Kohs in Texas has ever gone by "The Kohser", and he was fine with parting with his claim on the nickname.

laugh.gif

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

In the third day of voting, there are no surprises. The only real cliff-hangers are Wild Bill Connolley's hot pursuit of FT2 for the Runner-Up DICK position, and Gerard's duel with Chillum et al for Miss Incongeniality. In the other races, previous trends continue, including for Cla68, no sweat on the Cojones.

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

And Connolley pulls ahead! And what's this? MGodwin in hot pursuit, neck and neck with FT2! Dang, this is exciting! Meanwhile, Cla68 keeps the balls rolling in the Cojones event.

Posted by: Cock-up-over-conspiracy

When is going to end? When was the official Pee-dia founded? Wasn't 15 January 2001 when the .com was established?

Posted by: Peter Damian

I haven't voted yet.

Posted by: Trick cyclist

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sun 10th January 2010, 9:16pm) *

DO NOT VOTE until you read the following blurbs.

As a matter of interest are candidates allowed to vote?

And if so should we insist that they vote for themselves in the Dick category? smile.gif

QUOTE(Peter%20Damian @ Thu 14th January 2010, 10:44am) *

I haven't voted yet.

Hurry up please!

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

QUOTE(Trick cyclist @ Thu 14th January 2010, 4:45am) *

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sun 10th January 2010, 9:16pm) *

DO NOT VOTE until you read the following blurbs.

As a matter of interest are candidates allowed to vote?

And if so should we insist that they vote for themselves in the Dick category? smile.gif


1. All persons holding accounts at the Review are entitled to vote.

2. That's a matter of personal conscience.

--the Program and Catering Committee

Holy crap! FT2 has once again squeaked ahead of Wild Bill in the DICK Runner-Up position. And Chillum et al takes the lead for Miss Incongeniality. Cla68 is hangin' in there with the Cojones.

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

Voting has slowed to a trickle, with FT2 in the lead for Runner-Up Dick, although he could conceivably piss away his advantage and a few more votes could give the honors to Wild Bill or to OMGodwin. The Miss Incongeniality race could end in a tie. And Cla68 is headed for a two year, seminal streak with the Cojones.

Posted by: Random832

QUOTE(Cock-up-over-conspiracy @ Thu 14th January 2010, 7:19am) *
When is going to end?


When HK runs out of "Cojones" puns, obviously.

Posted by: Jon Awbrey

QUOTE(Random832 @ Fri 15th January 2010, 10:25am) *

QUOTE(Cock-up-over-conspiracy @ Thu 14th January 2010, 7:19am) *

When is going to end?


When HK runs out of "Cojones" puns, obviously.


If ya ain't banned yet, ya ain't got any.

co-Jon-es dry.gif

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

QUOTE(Random832 @ Fri 15th January 2010, 7:25am) *

QUOTE(Cock-up-over-conspiracy @ Thu 14th January 2010, 7:19am) *
When is going to end?


When HK runs out of "Cojones" puns, obviously.
That is basically correct, although traditionally we time the announcement of the results so as to upstage the Oscars and related prime-time awards shows.

Posted by: dtobias

QUOTE(Jon Awbrey @ Fri 15th January 2010, 10:30am) *

QUOTE(Random832 @ Fri 15th January 2010, 10:25am) *

QUOTE(Cock-up-over-conspiracy @ Thu 14th January 2010, 7:19am) *

When is going to end?


When HK runs out of "Cojones" puns, obviously.


If ya ain't banned yet, ya ain't got any.

co-Jon-es dry.gif


Keeping up with the co-Jones-es!

Posted by: Milton Roe

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Fri 15th January 2010, 8:11am) *

Voting has slowed to a trickle, with FT2 in the lead for Runner-Up Dick, although he could conceivably piss away his advantage and a few more votes could give the honors to Wild Bill or to OMGodwin. The Miss Incongeniality race could end in a tie. And Cla68 is headed for a two year, seminal streak with the Cojones.

Truly a seminal streak. I mean, you could see it with a handheld blacklight without even drawing the hotel room drapes. Cla, you should be proud, you should.

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

And Wild Bill pulls into the lead position for Runner-Up DICK. I've been rooting for him. Meanwhile, the members of the Academy are going nuts for Cla68 in the Cojones division.

Posted by: Cla68

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Sat 16th January 2010, 3:50pm) *

And Wild Bill pulls into the lead position for Runner-Up DICK. I've been rooting for him. Meanwhile, the members of the Academy are going nuts for Cla68 in the Cojones division.


I did not vote for myself in the cajones category, there are many candidates listed there who deserve it more than me. I voted for G-Dett, because she is such a good writer that I hope that she hasn't damaged her professional reputation or career potential through her connection with Wikipedia and her association with unethical jackasses like Jayjg. Most of those listed in the straight shooters category also deserve strong consideration. Too bad we can't have more than one. I voted for Mr. Connolley for Ms Incongeniality. He has worked really hard for that honor during his five-plus years of involvement with Wikipedia, and it would be a shame if he wasn't recognized for it. I would have suggested that Mr. Gerard be left off of the ballot this year, but then he went screaming to Daddy (MGodwin) when he was reprimanded by the ArbCom recently. Nice work David!

As far as tag team is concerned. I'm aware that Slim and Will made it abundantly clear after I posted the Eurasian Land Bridge article that they have it in for Don LaRouche. Consider, however, how impressive the team effort to control the Global Warming topic is, including defaming global warming skeptics in their BLPs, making sure that Michael Crichton's name isn't mentioned anywhere, chasing away newbies who made the mistake of trying to NPOV those articles, and ensuring that any content RfC's contrary to their positions went down in flames. I would say that their diligent efforts rival those of Jayjg's pro-Israel POV in spades, because they're still at it, while many in Jayjg's cabal have been invited to find another hobby.

Posted by: Jon Awbrey

QUOTE(Milton Roe @ Fri 15th January 2010, 10:19pm) *

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Fri 15th January 2010, 8:11am) *

Voting has slowed to a trickle, with FT2 in the lead for Runner-Up Dick, although he could conceivably piss away his advantage and a few more votes could give the honors to Wild Bill or to OMGodwin. The Miss Incongeniality race could end in a tie. And Cla68 is headed for a two year, seminal streak with the Cojones.


Truly a seminal streak. I mean, you could see it with a handheld blacklight without even drawing the hotel room drapes. Cla, you should be proud, you should.


The metaphor is biassed and strained in application to comparably e-quipped women candydates.

Then again, we're not talkin' belles de balles lettres here.

Jon tongue.gif

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

QUOTE(Cla68 @ Sat 16th January 2010, 9:20am) *

As far as tag team is concerned. I'm aware that Slim and Will made it abundantly clear after I posted the Eurasian Land Bridge article that they have it in for Don LaRouche. Consider, however, how impressive the team effort to control the Global Warming topic is, including defaming global warming skeptics in their BLPs, making sure that Michael Crichton's name isn't mentioned anywhere, chasing away newbies who made the mistake of trying to NPOV those articles, and ensuring that any content RfC's contrary to their positions went down in flames. I would say that their diligent efforts rival those of Jayjg's pro-Israel POV in spades, because they're still at it, while many in Jayjg's cabal have been invited to find another hobby.
Actually, Slim 'n' Will's most crowd-pleasing performance was the WMF Smackdown back in August-September. But I agree on AGW team; they deserve recognition, and I nominated them. I think Wild Bill and his entourage were the most newsworthy event of 2009, although Wild Bill can't seem to contend with Dave Gerard's legions of fans.

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

As we head into the final week of voting, three important competitions are up for grabs: the DICK Runner-Up, where FT2 has once again squeaked in front of Wild Bill Connolley; the Miss Incongeniality event, where the ever-popular Dave Gerard leads by a hair over Chillum and his multiple IDs; and the Straight Shooter event, which has been a cliff-hanger duel between Thatcher and Alison. Due to the sterling sportsmanship of Cla68, however, the Cojones is not up for grabs.

Posted by: Alison

Why oh why isn't Kevin (T-C-L-K-R-D) in the "Straight-shooter" category? Buy that man a whole crate of beer letsgetdrunk.gif applause.gif

Posted by: The Joy

QUOTE(Alison @ Wed 20th January 2010, 2:49am) *

Why oh why isn't Kevin (T-C-L-K-R-D) in the "Straight-shooter" category? Buy that man a whole crate of beer letsgetdrunk.gif applause.gif


He will be next year, I guess.

Posted by: Jon Awbrey

QUOTE(Herschelkrustofsky @ Mon 18th January 2010, 10:19am) *

Due to the sterling sportsmanship of Cla68, however, the Cojones is not up for grabs.


I can't quote ClaΦeet's recent remarks in Chambers, but it's obvious to me that you have Cojones confused with Bollocks.

Jon hrmph.gif

Posted by: Herschelkrustofsky

In response, I will say that I am fresh out of Cojones puns, that Wild Bill is looking good for Runner Up Dick, and that Miss Incongeniality is still too close to call, with only days remaining in the competition.