Open letter to Durova and anyone else it may concern, Dilution of the term "harassment" is offensive Options

[Anna]

Dear Durova and anyone else who thinks that the mere act of sending unwanted e-mails constitutes "harassment",

This is in reference to the information published here:
http://wikipediareview.com/index.php?showtopic=34354

If I understand correctly, you (that is to say, Durova and possibly others), believe that sending unwanted e-mails constitutes "harassment", even when those e-mails are on the topic of a public action you took, and contain nothing obscene, threatening, sexist, racist, classist, homophobic, ablist, etc.?

If that is the case, I am greatly offended, as a person who has known many who have experienced real harassment.

Harassment is when people threaten to kill, recklessly endanger, or do violence unto you, for any reason. Harassment is when the police threaten to take away a lady's wheelchair because she "refuses" to get on a sidewalk that lacks a wheelchair access point. Harassment is when a clerk calls a customer a terrorist because her breathing equipment obscures part of her face and refuses to provide customer service. Harassment is when a man throws a rock through the window of a woman who rejected him. (It is also vandalism.) Harassment is when a group of people call a black man the n-word repeatedly and throw things at him or kick him. (It is also assault and battery.) Harassment some druggie decides to attack someone for no reason that would make sense to a typical non-druggie. Harassment is when a man gropes at a woman he is not in a relationship with, especially if she has clearly indicated that this is unwelcome. Harassment is when someone keeps waking you up in the middle of the night, e.g. by banging on the door at 4AM in the morning, especially after being told that this is unwelcome. (It might also be trespassing.)

You, ladies and gentlemen, do not sound as though you have ever experienced anything vaguely resembling harassment, or you would not dilute the term so offensively. And if you have, well, you know what they say about crying wolf.

Emails of non-threatening, non-derogatory protest are not harassment. If it were, Change.org and other petition sites like it would be shut down. In fact, e-mails of non-threatening, non-derogatory protest are free speech. It could be classified as annoying, but being annoying isn't a crime.

There are, of course, simple ways to avoid reading e-mails which annoy you. You could, for example, use a filter. You could delete the annoying e-mails unopened. Many people keep separate e-mail accounts for friends and for public matters.

Yours truly,
Anna

P.S. To readers who are concerned about being falsely accused of harassment, racism, sexism, etc., on the basis of private e-mails, the best way to avoid it is to communicate publicly with people you don't know personally, especially on any remotely controversial topic. For example, you may observe that I am posting this letter publicly, for the world to see, rather than e-mailing it to anyone privately. This can help avoid he-said she-said arguments.

[Anna]

Phone calls are different because they ring loudly, thus allowing them to do things like wake you up in the middle of the night, and it's harder to screen out unwanted callers. A few advanced phone systems now have the ability to block certain callers, but a lot of phones still don't, and even the ones that do often require the telephone user to go online. In fact, a lot of people still don't have Caller ID. Also, exes are different that people who disagree with you about some action you took publicly.

Ottava, suppose, hypothetically speaking of course, that I were to tell you that I wanted no further contact with you. Suppose I were to tell you that I wanted you to avoid responding to me in any thread which I started, or, for that matter, any thread I chose to comment on. Suppose that even though I said this, I continued to say things like "Ottava is excessively paranoid and thinks I'm some sort of identity stealer called Poetlister even though I've confirmed by phone that I have a woman's voice", but that if you responded to the accusation that you are paranoid, I said things like "No means no. Please stop reminding me of your existence."

Hypothetically speaking of course, how would you respond?