The 2009 Wikipedia Review WP:DICK of Distinction Awards Pageant

May we have the envelope, please...


This year's winner is renowned for his keen fashion sense, as well as his incandescent charm and sterling sense of fairness and justice. We proudly present this year's Jimbo® statuette to:

David Gerard!

In a real cliff-hanger of a match, David squeaked ahead of the runner-up in this year's competition, FT2, who put up a spirited fight. We expect great things of FT2 in future competitions.






Deep in the catacombs beneath the Wikipedia Review, there is a vast chamber, from which may be heard the eerie cackling of Somey as he labors over his image editor/avatar generator. It is said to be like a cross between Vulcan's Forge and one of Dr. Seuss's contraptions. It is here, they say, that Somey produced the new, 2009 model Jimbo® statuette:








And now, before proceeding the the winners in the other categories, we'd like to present this...

PoetGuy!

PoetGuy delighted Wikipedia fans, and in particular, those of us at the Review, with his outstanding performance in innumerable sockpuppet roles, literally, a cast of thousands (known to the cognoscenti as "PoetHorde.") As the pert coquette "Poetlister," he became for a time Wikipedia's most celebrated martyr, believed to have been unjustly banned for socking. When the truth of his culpability came out, PoetGuy was disgraced. His old nemesis SlimVirgin wrote a self-righteous tome in which she made PoetGuy the center of a vast conspiracy against herself, and attempted to make his disgrace into her vindication. However, among members of the Academy, PoetGuy's performances in such a wide array of roles deserve to be recognized as the pinnacle of his craft, right up there with The Three Faces of Eve.

Let's take a minute now to remember PoetGuy's contributions to the Review. (roll clip) As Poetlister, he was named by Lir to be an admin at this site. The Poetlister character enchanted us with her endearing fantasies, including a fake wedding and honeymoon on a romantic isle, embellished with images from From Here to Eternity. Then there was Guy, the stuffy, proper Englishman with a heart of gold and an obsession with Christian Zionism. Guy became a moderator here. He had a faithful, putatively Jewish companion, Yehudi. And finally, there was the flip side of the stuffy, proper Englishman, in the form of the ever-popular Taxwoman, who was raunchy, babelicious, and an expert on the London Fetish Scene.

So, for having generated unforgettable drama at Wikipedia and across the wide, wide interwebs, the 2009 Lifetime Achievement Award goes to PoetGuy!

...and now, back to our regular awards presentation: the Straight Shooter award for most ethical admin goes to Thatcher, who made a very strong showing, thanks in part to a ringing endorsement from this year's runner-up, Cool Hand Luke (who is actually now an Arb.) Cool Hand's nom de Review, of course, is One.

The Cojones de latón, for the non-admin who has distinguished himself in combat with the cabal, goes to Cla68, who was last year's runner-up. This year's runner-up is The Fat Man Who Never Came Back, who was particularly recognized for his lethal use of humor on the battlefield.

In the Miss Incongeniality department, Elonka and JzG wound up in a dead heat, so they will be sharing the honors. This marks the second year in a row where JzG has made it to the top -- his incivility is legend! And Elonka makes her debut sharing the number one spot.

Finally, in the Tag Team Event, the award goes to Odd nature, Salmon of Doubt, KillerChihuahua, Jim62sch, Mu301 and FeloniousMonk, also known as the ID (Intelligent Design) Cabal.

Congratulations all around, and we'll see you next year on the red carpet!